such a wonderful feeling

 It's not yet Christmas but i feel so much blessed! Let me just enumerate why...

This is actually my first Christmas to have someone - literally and officially. yes, i am in a relationship already! 2 months narin kaming naglolokohan ng mokong.. hehe..

nakwento ko na naman sa previous blogs ko yung kung pano sya nagtapat diba? tapos yun, kung pano ko rin naman sinagot..well, we already had some "hard times" together, i guess to early to have some, but i dont find it such a bad thing, kase dun ko sya mas lalo nakikilala. and then after such "weird moment" we have eh oki na ulit. tapos mas naiinitindihan namin isa't-isa. :)

This past few days,we were inseparable.. hehe.. kase naman no, magkasama kami sa work. haha. last friday was our team's christmas party held at QC, in Hazel's house. Grabe ang layo ah. we hitched with Boss Vince going there. then after the party, we headed to Cavite, we had to be back early, pero ayun, late narin. 4am na kami nakauwi, eh dapat 5am paalis na kami for Batangas - medical mission ng family namin. i decided to go there in the afternoon na, kase mahirap na, baka atakihin na naman ako no.

when we got there, of course, i introduced him to everybody. o diba. pogi daw bf ko. haha. wow! eh kase naman maganda ko no! haha. joke lang. kapal ko naman. anyways, so there, it was nice. we slept at tita tessie's house right across the "mansion" - our ancestral home.

the following day, we weren't not able to go home early. we went to my relatives' house. tapos dapat punta kami sa ilog, ligo kami at pictures. kaso hindi na natuloy. there was a different plan pala. ayun,we went sa "bayan" sa binyagan. free food! ok narin. sarap.

my tito ody (dad's kuya) talked to us. parang marriage counseling! i swear! i was like, "uh, tito.. dumadalaw lang po kami sa inyo" haha. it was funny but at the same time, it was nice. he was just concerned about you know, us getting married and all. he was speaking for the Lord. ang galing!

all in all, it was a great experience!

here's a picture of my "Atas" (my sister) in Canada. She left last December 3 to work abroad. It was sad thinking that she has to leave the country to work and partially be the breadwinner. BUT at the same time, it was an answered prayer as well! she wanted so bad to be there and start anew.

my ate has gone through a lot here. i must say, medyo parang galit na sya sa buhay nya dito. she was always complaining! she badly wanted to leave para daw umasenso buhay nya. and now that she's there, i know that she's made the right choice and is now happy. nakakatuwa that when i called her, she just kept making kwento about how nice it is there.. sabi nya "hay nako, dapat punta kayo dito.."

This my bestbud cousin - Mikmik. :) He works in Saudi as a microbiologist. diko keri, grabe. haha.
he came home to visit this Christmas and as far as i can remember, a month before he came, we were chatting through ym, discussing about our "date" when he gets here.

I kinda sensed something at that time. and i was right. i just made him confirm it. all i can say is that i love him for being just himself. all i said was i was glad that it's like i had a twin sister and he does feel the same. hihi.

we're gonna have another date soon. ah basta, wala lang agawan ng boypren, insan. haha. sasabunutan talaga kita. gagang to! haha..

------

so there. these are just SOME of them.

inaantok nako. at hindi pako naliligo.. hihi..

magandang gabi.

"basta!"

Ilang beses ko na bang narinig ang salitang yan sayo? Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit kapag napapansin kong ika'y nananahimik at aking tatanungin, ang sasabihin mo'y "basta!"

aba, hon! hindi ako manghuhula para malaman kung ano ba talaga! nung nakaraan ang sabi mo naman eh "basta, lahat yun!"
it's so frustrating to realize that you are upset over something that i can't seem to figure out! yesterday was kinda annoying.. you were acting like a kid and making me feel like i don't exist! that i don't matter to you.. is this some kind of retaliation?? we gotta fix this. we gotta talk and compromise and really really really fix  this.

if you can go on with your day with feelings like these, then i envy you, because i can't!

i hope it's this easy to carry on. it's as easy as typing these words in this blog.

hon, i miss you. and i wanna hug you.

a fresh start...

a comment from Elainey from my previous blog..

"i thank God because i was able to relinquish all the bitterness i felt before He sent me vince. sometimes we just need to let go. then we'll learn that life has much more in store for us na nde naten napapansin because we were so busy holding on to our past. be it masaya, or masakit.. bitiw na. :)"

Let me start with this.. Actually, when i opened this blog, Marc was looking as well. He suddenly looked away when i happen to open a blog about me and my ex. I can still sense it. He is not really ok with RJ.

--------------

In my other blog, I have shared how marc expressed his plans of pursuing me. then it was followed by a blog about me actually giving answers to his proposal. :)

yes, i have a boyfriend again. and of course, there are those doubts and fears. i think it's part of getting into another relationship - it's always a risk - something that is worth taking.

for the past weeks, we have had issues - about our ex's.

he didn't want me to refer RJ in the company where we are working now. he said, he doesn't really care about what rj would say or do to him. he just doesn't want him in our company. actually, i get it. marc doesn't want rj near me. period.

and what was his issue? well, after a week of us being a couple, he lied to me and met up with his ex!! ok, ok... i know i know. for us ladies, that seems to be really UNACCEPTABLE! i gave him the benefit of the doubt. i gave him the chance to explain. he met up with her to tell her about us. i get it naman. but still, i dont care much about him meeting up with the ex. what annoys me so much is the act of lying. im pretty sure, everyone hates it, right? so there.. after a conversation, i finally forgave him. but here's the thing - i still couldn't get over it. don't blame me for this, ok? so after a weekend spent - i talked to him again. told him that i dont want him meeting up with her anymore and reminded him that I TOTALLY DONT WANT HIM LYING to me EVER AGAIN!

hay, i know this might seem like not a good start, but hey, i believe in us. and we will certainly make this work. as far as i know, we both don't have issues with our ex's (emotionally speaking). we have been friends with them, well atleast for me. he just started talking to his ex recently. background: he broke up with her last year kase ayaw na nya. very simple = ayaw na nya. this kinda scares me na baka gawin nya rin saken, but he told me, it is different. the ex and me are two different creatures with different personalities (and appearances, ahem! haha)

---------------------

i just feel so blessed about everything. i have a great job and i have a good relationship. :) plus, i have accountable people in the office (Christians din) who would always remind me to be a good girl in a godly relationship. :)

para sa akin nga ba?

I read tishy's blog about some quote she read somewhere.. it was a *kilig* quote.. anyways, ako naman merong gustong i-share na text message:

"pakawalan mo yung mga bagay na nakakasakit sayo
kahit na pinasasaya ka nito..
wag mong hintayin yung araw
na sakit na lang nararamdaman mo
at iniwan ka na ng kasiyahan mo.."
-Bob Ong-

this message struck me.. haha.. kailangan ko na nga bang bitawan ang mga bagay na nagdudulot ng kurot sa aking damdamin? panahon na ba para tuluyang tanggalin ang pagkakagapos ng mga bagay na yon?

ah, alam ko na.. alam ko naman.. umpisa pa lamang ay wala nang linaw.. ngunit tila ayoko rin namang bigyang linaw.. i myself is not ready to know or even ready to give my whole self.. too much anxieties..

conclusion..

para sakin nga ang text message na ito.. haha..

ikaw? nakakarelate ka ba? 

how was the "longest" 15 minutes?

hmmm.. anyways, he came to the office around 1pm.. he said he needed to be back to ortigas by 3pm, so most likely we'll be spending time together for 30 minutes only. we had lunch at world topps. conversation was nice, as always.. time flew so fast that we didn't realize it's past 3 already. he stayed longer than planned.. he even brought me to my office.. it was "bitin" but we can't do anything about it.. he texted me when he got back to ortigas..

that night, i met up with him again.. but it was sort of a disaster because i made him feel like my "driver"  nakakahiya because i made him wait.. when i got on the car, he was joking and said that it's going to be the last time he'd go out of the way to see me..  well, i knew he was kidding..

we had dinner at MOA..

we took this on our back to the car.. sweet..

the day went so fast, but it was really fun! *kilig*